And better yet, we present our list as an actual list, instead of making you click through a freakin' slideshow. You're welcome.
The Top 13 Reasons Not to Go to Disney World
1. Nobody can tell you what to do with your hands and arms at all times.
2. The last time you took a small child firmly by the hand, you ended up with a restraining order.
3. The blatant celebration of the royalty is abhorrent to everything we stand for in America.
4. They haven't done anything about their rodent problem.
5. You have pediophobia (fear of dolls).
6. Because it's not a small world after all. It's actually 7,918 miles wide.
7. You'll meet people from all over the world... as well as all their germs and viruses.
8. Disney's frozen bananas are inferior imitations of Bluth's Original Frozen Banana.
9. Your local movie theater lets you sit in the middle of the row, without barking at you to slide all the way down.
10. It turns out that Walt's not really frozen under the castle after all.
11. You want to see a Yeti that moves.
12. You are a Marvel Comics character.
13. If you don't go, the lines will be one person shorter for the rest of us.
Thank you to everyone who abides by our rules for writers and helps to keep the conversations here informative, welcoming, and, on a good day, funny!
I enjoyed the TPI list MUCH better. You're right - if you're a Disney-hater, then stay the heck out of the parks and leave one more space for those of us who can appreciate a wholesome good time!
"R-I-C...see you in the sewer, sucker!
K-E-Y...why? Because we're vermin!
R-R-A-A-T!
And this is from an old guy who remembers the original Mickey Mouse Club, I mean the original black-and-white series on our black-and-white tv in the afternoon after school.
Great article! Loved all 13 reasons.
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